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“She’s my sister, so when she acts like that, I have to clean up her mess.”
“He’s my husband, and every time, I’m the one who has to apologize for him, and he makes me look bad.”
I want to share something with you that I’m having to learn myself. You’re not responsible for the actions of other people. Good for you, really, for being a loyal friend or family member, and apologizing for the shortcomings of someone who hasn’t got enough self-awareness or maturity to do it for themselves. That’s incredibly nice of you. Just realize… you don’t have to have an answer for their misbehavior.
It is not your fault that someone you love, or someone you’re close to, doesn’t know how to treat people. You may be the exact opposite type of person, so you really can’t help but feel guilty, or like you need to make up for their behavior… but it’s just not so. You are only responsible for your own actions, and the way that you treat people.
It’s beautiful that you would apologize for someone else, believing that you have a duty to try to make up for them.
It doesn’t reflect poorly on you. If your kids don’t know how to respect their elders, that reflects on you. But if a grown man or woman that you did not raise doesn’t show respect where it should be shown, that’s a reflection solely on them. Even if you did raise them, if you taught them right from wrong but they chose not to listen, you still can’t just blame yourself.
It’s true, even, that someone out there might judge you based on their interactions with someone else. We’re told all the time that we are a representative of who we work for, so represent the right way! Don’t let the bosses down.
Ultimately, do good. Be kind, be personable, and be out to improve the air around you, not drag people down. Do not let those that want to drag you down succeed. Be a light in the dark.